Goals ‘n Stuff!

Hello my Dear Readers!

It’s been to long, and is good to be back. Happy (almost) March!!! 🙂
I have set some goals for myself, and plan to try to accomplish them…care to read them?

  1. Spend more time with God.
    Everyone knows I am a Jesus Freak. And though I like to think that I spend time with my savior, and best friend, I don’t as much as I’d like, or feel like I should. I spend a lot of time in prayer, and in praise, but how much am I digging down deep into my theology? I love theology. I honest to goodness do! But how much am I challenging myself?
  2. Blog more.
    This is pretty self explanatory. I hope to blog at least once  week.
  3. Put up more songs.
    Once a week too? Maybe?
  4. Write more songs.
    I love music. Writing lyrics can be such a great escape for me…and it is often one of my ways to spend time with God. Taking scripture, and translating it into lyrics, and music?
  5. Journal more.
    Journaling my hopes, thoughts, and feelings helps me, SO MUCH. I don’t know why. It just does….plus: it makes for good memories later!
  6. Work on my book.
    I just like writing, and I want to finish another book! 🙂
  7. Finish my NLS.
    “NLS” stands for “National LifeSaving Course”, though I have’t kept you posted on this, I have succeeded in getting Bronze Medallion, Bronze Cross, and Standard First Aid, and my hope is to become a lifeguard!!! 🙂 I am asthmatic, athletic, and allergy induced. This makes the physical aspects of these courses A LOT harder on me….and I REALLY want to pass these.
  8. Survive Grade 11.
  9. Eat healthier.
    I think we all struggle with eating habits, and I want to get in shape, and eat better.
  10. Not “fret” so much.I am the type of person who is very detailed oriented, when it comes to certain things. I also tend to overthink things…extremely sometimes!  For example, last night I started thinking about a (good) conversation I had with my close friend, the I started hoping that what I was saying wasn’t projecting the wrong idea. I had started telling them about the fact that I had been feeling slightly lonely lately. Most of the things I was saying made me hope that
    (a): I didn’t seem self-centered.
    (b): I didn’t feel uninterested in their life.
    (c): That I was desperate, and unsocial.
    (d): That I was insecure.
    I just want to be a good servant. I want to be there for people, and I don’t mind speaking my mind…but I don’t want to hurt, annoy or be self-centred. How can I help others, if I’m caught up in myself?
    Desperate and unsocial? As far as I know, I’m neither.
    As for the “insecure” part…I’m not insecure. I’ve always known who I am, and what I enjoy. I’m fine with who I am: appearance, and personality wise…I can be a little to loud, a little crazy, and a tad annoying…but that’s okay. People can choose to adjust to it, or they can choose to not get to know me better. Sometimes though, I worry that I might scare away some of the people I hold closest, and dearest. Perhaps that is “insecure”…but it’s not as much of an insecurity as a fear. And perhaps that isn’t even right. It’s not even worry that I scared them off…it’s more the fact that I DON’T want to annoying them, or hurt them, or be the person that they don’t want to talk too. These are the people that I hold in my heart, think about, and love as brothers and sisters. I want them to want to talk to me too…
  11. Use the opportunities I have.
    I guess this isn’t as much of a “goal” as it’s more of a “ongoing continuation.”
    I live in a small town with limited options, and also money can be tight. I want to do my best, and I try to push my limits, but lately I struggle with the “what if I could be more?” question. I’ve always wanted to be a Student Dance Instructor. But as much as I love the ladies at our local dance studio as of late I hadn’t felt as if I was learning, and was being pushed to learn, and extend my limits. I wasn’t learning, was I? I didn’t feel like I was climbing up, but rather, standing bored. I also never felt quite accepted, and like I was given a fair chance. I love the ladies at the studio, I honestly do, but that was what I felt like. I guess the dream ran out of steam? Maybe? Possibly? I don’t know. 😛 I might pick up dance again next year…it costs quite a bit of money though…we shall see.
    On top of that, I want to learn more music. I want to learn, and grow, and experience. I’m going to have to work for everything I get. So that’s what I’ll do.
    I want to be and do the best I can. In everything. And that takes work.
    I’m not afraid of hard work.
    I like to think that I have used all the opportunities that I’ve been presented with. And I plan to keep doing this.

There we go. 🙂
I’m glad you got to read this.
And I’m glad I got to write this.
Keep on Keeping On!
(Yes Will, I DID steal that from you!!!)
JENESSA JOY♥

PS–My overthinking brain has told me to say this: please do not take anything I have said as bragging, putting myself or something…these are just the way I see myself, my heart, and my feelings. 

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